Dominic's new IEP

Today is a day I dread every year. To have to do it twice (once with Dominic, and then with Damien) is even more of a pain. Dominic's is always in April, Damien's in May. I hope today goes well. I think for the most part Dominic completed his goals well this year. Nothing has been said about medication although I have expressed that I would rather not put him on ADHD medicine. The only thing that had been said this year was that Dominic may have PDD's of Autism which we have been hearing since he was in 3 yr old preschool.

So hopefully it will go well and we'll get some good goals or better yet maybe he'll graduate! That would be awesome! I doubt though but as he goes through each year he has grown greatly by the end. It will be interesting to see the goals they have thought up for him!

Quirks

Dominic's teacher sent home a note the other day saying he refuses to use and then gets very upset over the fact that he does not have the same crayons as the other kids in his class so she's supplying him with Crayolas until I can buy him some. According to her, he can see a difference in the color between Roseart and Crayola. I have no clue and he won't tell me. Anyways it's a bit frustrating!

Change Is NOT Good

My life with Dominic could be described as anxious you could say. Every school year the first few weeks I am a worrying mess about if anything is going to trigger him, if a teacher isn't going to understand his needs, etc. Overstimulation is one of the biggest problems we have with Dom and I feel like we are always walking a tight rope.

School has been in session for about 3 weeks now. Dominic has came home upset nearly daily about 2 of those weeks. (sigh) Come to find out there are 2..count them....1....2....Dominic's in his class this year. The teacher informed me before school started that she was going to have to come up with some way to call the boys' name. Well her answer was to call Dominic "D." Yes just the letter D and he's not taking it well at all. He comes home very upset with tears welling up in his eyes (he is super sensitive) screaming or pounding on the table, "I'm not 'D' I'm Dominic!!!!" He talks about the other Dominick in an evil tone clearly despising there is another kid with this name in school. I'm afraid he may just take action and try ridding class of the other Dominick.

I wrote his teacher a note trying to explain he does not adapt well with change which is part of his IEP situation since he's been diagnosised with SID. I asked for her very nicely if she could please try to find another way to call Dominic rather than "D" because it's too much of a change for him and he's really not liking it. She wrote back she noticed that he was pretty upset with it and that she would try to figure something else out. I think the worst part is that the kids in his class have started doing it except for 2 that were in his class last year and he's probably screaming "my name's Dominic, not D!!!!" It's all very upsetting to him.

Hopefully she figures something out because it's little things like this that can really screw up the year. We've had several instances of just the slightest change that will throw him off such as having to move from a blue chair to a red or not sitting on the Dinosaur in circle time anymore. These little things can ruin him for weeks if it's not solved quickly. He's got a Para sitting with him and hopefully she can help him by calling him Dominic since she's dealing only with him (part of his IEP for the ADHD and SID)

Dominic's Re-Eval for his IEP

First off I was really impressed how the meeting went. A bit overwhelming but I made it through. A summary to all this below is Dominic will have a Para working with him daily 2.5 hrs in the morning. He will not be taken out of class for special ed services which is AWESOME so he will be just like the other kids (except for the para)

Dave and I were there along with the following staff.

• Mr. George Principal of Elementary school
• Mrs. K- Dominic's current teacher
• Kris- Dom's EI Special Ed teacher who comes to work with him
• Lena- School Psychologist for Elementary school
• Susie- EI Speech Pathologist
• Barb- the Elementary Special Ed Teacher
• Mrs. B- Dominic's assigned Kindergarten Teacher
• Susan- Elementary Speech Pathologist
• (missing) Robbie- Occupational Therapist

As far as academic achievement and performance, they found that he is still cognitively delayed and will need some help to keep up with his peers. On Communication he is at a 55 mth level (he's 63 months old) for expressive language. He is at 50 mth level for Receptive. So basically he communicates awesome now but when you ask him to do something he doesn't quite understand. He made some improvements on completing tasks but still not up to par. Because of this he has a hard time following directions and answering questions in a classroom.

Socially he has improved quite a bit but is still delayed. He needs to learn to share, follow rules, play with peers. They described him quite abit as a loner which makes me sad. Here is what exactly is wrote on his IEP from the teacher's standpoint.

Dominic s active in the classroom often touching other students, getting in their space, or moving around in his set. His attention to task varies. Sometimes he is very engaged in the activity while other times he is completely turned around looking away from the source of instruction. he has difficulty understanding personal boundaries as well as classroom expectations At times it appears as though he acts on impulse without realizing he is breaking a class rule, such as when he takes objects out of the center areas around the classroom. It doesn't appear as though he is doing this deliberately to be defiant but rather he is playing and just wrapped up in what he is doing. There are tims when he is defiant and resists adult instruction especially when it is a table time activity that is little interest to him.

When he was 4, his EI teacher had me have him tested for ADHD which he scored borderline ADHD/more oppositional. I don't believe she ever put it in his folder though. It seemed to me they were trying not to just slap the title on him so I went ahead and told them that we expected this as he had been tested for ADHD and did score that he did indeed have ADHD but we chose not to medicate.

The Sensory Processing testing we did a few months back did identify him as a SID child/student (THANK THE LORD!! ANSWERS! OMG!) Just hearing that finally made me just about start crying right there at the table as they read it. I had my head looking down just shaking my head in agreement. Based on classroom observation by EI, testing his Teacher and I both took they will be giving him OT to work with this and fine motor skills since he still can't hold a pencil right.

So here's his accommodations this year

• classroom visual schedule
• seating close to teacher
• removing extra materials from work area
• clear explanation of behavior explained in a way he can understand
• prepare for changes n chdule but maintain consistet schedule as much as possible
• allow additional time for responding to tasks
• demonstrate activities or directions that need to be completed
• frequent prompting and redirection
• small group instruction as much as possible
• frequent repetition of new concepts
• use of visual cues and hands on learning
• teacher will use behavioral charts for rewarding
• Special ed teacher will check in twice a month for updates

On District and State Assessment testing he will be given additional time, a small group environment, demonstration o directions, and use of visual cues as allowed.

We made a Behavior Intervention Plan with strategies, consequences, and crisis management (lets hope that never is needed!) Dominic has always had a very hard time controlling anger. At Early Intervention, he hit, kicked, screamed, slapped teachers and bus drivers. They would have to restrain him, rock him, put him in a quiet place to settle down. Now he hasn't been hitting much but he won't move to where he needs to go, runs away, screams, cries, etc.

So anyways that is a summary of the meeting. In all it was a hour and a half long! We had a book of papers to take home and go through. It went very well though, I'm pleased, alittle worried about no summer services but we'll try homeschooling as much as possible this summer to see if we can keep him on task and caught up.

Dominic's Parent Teacher Conference

Yesterday we had our 2nd parent teacher conference with Dominic's teacher this year. She told us that Dominic is really doing pretty well on his school work. He's recognizing letters, counting to 20 easier, overall he's improving on everything. She said his social skills have really improved from how he was at the beginning of the year.

She said behaviorally they have good weeks and bad weeks with Dominic. They'll have several good weeks and then be stuck in a bad one which is how it is here at home. She started telling me of a few situations which I will tell EI about because I know she hasn't. She mentioned how if he's zoned out of what they are doing or when frustrated he will sit with his head on his knees and rock back and forth which she "knew" was an Autistic trait but she didn't see him as Autistic. People she has NO CLUE about Disabilities. I think that's what frustrating me the most with the school is the lack of knowledge. After that remark I told her that at Early Intervention I was told when he was 3, he resembles a child with PDD's of Autism. I explained to her how it was a branch (so to speak) of Autism but a child appears more "normal" if you want to call it that. We talked about the SID testing that she had filled out and how she thought some of the questions really pertained to him. I told her I had been researching SID for awhile so I was confident that was what was going on too but I had no idea that Aspergers or PDD's (highly functioning Autism) children usually had SID.

She said that when he is upset he will still run off and hide or sit in a corner. At the beginning of the year he would only sit on the dinosaur at circle time but now he is willing to let other kids sit there. If upset, sometimes he will roll all around the room instead of walking. He will have a bad day when she is gone so they have to be careful on those days. If she tells him their schedule has changed, he will blow up at her for example no show and tell. He talks about hotwheels all day at school but does his work. He is still not able to hold a pencil right but hopefully the OT coming from EI will be able to work with him on that.

Overall it went well. I think she knows that he's got some problems that we need to get solved with him before Kindergarten. I am so scared for next year. I know we'll be having most likely some sort of transition conference to discuss Kindergarten with the principal and 3 teachers. I want someone next year who can tolerate his behavior yet help him when his Para isn't around. I want him to succeed instead of being labeled a bad kid and failing because some stupid teacher can't help figure him out.

Dominic Playing XBox on Break From School.....

"Awwww man! Momma! I've been Served!!"

I can't even believe that 2 years ago we couldn't get 2 words pieced together out his mouth and now look at him.

Sick...Supposedly

Yesterday I got another call from the assistant teacher this time telling me I needed to come pick up because Dominic just threw up in a trash can at lunch. They would not be putting him on the bus and I have to come get him NOW and he's not to come back to school tomorrow. The way she said it pissed me off. If he's sick, it's usually a very easy thing to pick out. So I changed the other 2, got coats and shoes and we drove to the school which is about 10 minutes from our house. I went in through the gym and the nastiest smell hit me. They were having some awful looking Ravioli. Dominic was sitting in the office waiting for me since the 2nd preschool class had started and they needed to put him somewhere. He was fine so we started going back through the gym because I wanted to ask what happened. They told me he was just sitting there looking around then he got up and walked to the trash can and threw up. I almost wanted to say the smell in the gym made me want to throw up so I see why he did but I kept my mouth shut. By this time Dominic and Damien are jumping and playing around. Dominic's not acting sick. I tell her before I left, "well I hope you guys are right that it's stomach flu because he throws up at our table nearly everyday. It's not a big deal for him to get sick at home and that's why Kris is going to be evaluating him for SID." She probably doesn't even know what the hell that means.

We come home and he's fine all day. Stomach flu for any of us is only a 24 hour thing. They were trying to tell me Monday he was tired and Tuesday he was acting sick. He's completely fine here. No throwing up at home, played with trains, transformers, and watched some Thomas movies. He fought with Mia about getting off his train track, he did not act sick after bringing him home. I asked him if he felt sick and he said no. We even took him to Awana last night and he had a blast. So anyways today is Valentine's day and he's missing out of his party because they say he is not to come today. He is going to be so upset if he sees Alex with her Valentines from school and he has nothing. There's no school friday and next week they don't even HAVE school so I'm calling the office to tell the receptionist to make sure Alex gets his stuff because he's already pissed he can't go to school.

I am so mad and oh don't start Dave back up on this because he's ready to lay into the teachers. If they can prove to us some sort of stomach flu then fine but when he's acting great but the food looks and smells like shit, then I'm sure that's what set him off.

Man Up!

The past week Dominic's emotions have just been out of control. He cries at everything. He's seriously out to kill Santa for not bringing him a Mr. Big Modfighter by Hotwheels. Seriously. He was telling me that it fell out of Santa's sleigh and you could just see the anger and tears starting to appear in his glazed eyes.

Last night we went to Target. Target for me is a nightmare but I knew they'd have 75% off Christmas by now. So we went and it was an absolute nightmare. Dominic wanted an roboraptor and was not leaving without one. When I shopped the day after Christmas i found this mini wind up Robopet thing that I believed was in his tastes so I bought it. Big mistake. The robo pet is now his favorite toy and he cries if he's lost it. It's name is "cocoa" but it's green. The box showed the other robo toys and now he wants them all, especially the raptor. So long story short, I bought my things and Dave took him to the car. We came home and he was still sobbing uncontrollably about not getting it. We told him we'd take a few of his duplicate toys back and he could get a roboraptor but he needed to calm down. He was having a hard time breathing he was so upset. It was awful. I can't say this was the first time he acted like this because it's not. That's why I do the whole thing where I let him put a toy in the basket and then ask the clerk to put it back at the register because I'm not buying it since if I say no he'll fall to the floor in a fit. It's just easier to break his heart in the car after he's buckled up. Wrong I know but after it getting harder to deal with in the stores now I've had to resort to that.

Last night Dave was trying to calm Dominic, treating him like a baby. I really don't think this is how his crying fits need to be handled. He can't always expect toys when we go to Target and Walmart. I asked him if he'd like a big bawl baby son when he's in grade school because that's how he's going to be the way he's treating him. I don't know if Dominic's emotions are out of whack from being spoiled or if anything else is to blame. I'm getting to the point where I hate to say "oh it might be this." I'd like to say he's just trying to get his way.

Be Fair and Share

Dominic has always had a very hard time sharing and actually part of his IEP is working on his social skills. Since Christmas and this new assortment of new toys flowing into the house, he's been getting worse. Every boy type toy in this house he believes is his. No matter if he saw Damien open it for his birthday or Christmas. I'm completely frustrated with him about how he melts down throwing himself on the floor bawling. His Para says he's doing OK with sharing there but you can tell he bites his lip alot of the time and just wants to deck a kid for asking for his toy and having to share.

Tonight was just horrible. It started with a Hotwheel that Damien was playing with that Dominic got for Christmas. He ran up to Damien and snatched it. Then Damien got upset and we told him he couldn't do that (like we always do) and told him to give it back in which he threw it and then threw himself on the floor rolling around screaming and crying. Then Damien kept trying to give it back to him (yeah Damien hates seeing his siblings crying and always trys fixing the situation) and then Dominic just kept screaming and kicking so we sent him to his room.

I just wish this would quit. He going to be 5 in just 2 months. You'd think he would outgrow this stage but he's not. This is like an everyday thing for me and I'm so sick of it.

Good Days, Then The Bad

Dominic has had a pretty decent week. We had Parent Teacher conferences and his teacher believes they just need to figure out all his little quirks. I agree. I think once they find what sets him off, what to keep him from, what zones him, etc. they will have better days. That was how it was at Early Intervention. He's earning behavior bucks when he's good and they are sending home a daily sheet I send with him. They circle a happy or sad face for each day and that is how he earns his buck. The bucks can be then used for something like a hot wheel car or a happy meal, etc.

Bed wetting started happening so frequently (with him sleeping straight through it) that I've recently put him back into pull ups for the time being. I'm good at finding the deals so as long as I can get them cheap I'll just buy them again. I've looked at tons of sites for absorbent cloth pull ups but they are too expensive for one use ($20-30 for 1 pair!) and some sites can't guarantee they can even be used all night so that was a dead end.

Otherwise things have been well. I was about to give up on keeping him in gymnastics but then he did great this week so now I just don't know! I know the involvement in sports and other activities really help but I hate putting others through having to work with him when they first don't understand why he acts the way he does. Most people think he's just spoiled or "hyper."

No Foods, Only Enviromentals

To see if foods have anything to do with Dominic's behavior, we had Dominic allergy tested the other day which was not fun. No food allergies but he was allergic to just about anything enviromental. I had no idea you could be allergic to Coackroaches. He'll never come into those with daddy's profession. LOL!! Again I was referred to Heartsprings so I researched their site online. Oh my! I hope they will take us in and help us!!! Not only do they deal with children on IEP's for speech and other delays they help with behavioral issues as well! Maybe we can finally get some answers figuring out what going on with Dominic. So today I am calling the insurance to find out if it will cover the appointments. I'm also going to call the ENT about getting his tonsils removed since the allergist thinks it needs to be done. We saw an ENT Dr about a year ago and I just couldn't put Dominic through it at that time because I didn't think it was necessary.

I'm About Two Seconds.....

from calling Dominic's old teacher at his old school and beg her to put him back in her class. Dominic so far this week has been hiding under tables from the teacher, yelling "no!" running from them on the playground when it's time to come in. He's supposed to go to Kindergarten next year. HOW?!?! How is this to work? He is so smart but everything else just holds him back. I don't know what else to do besides call his old teacher. I think he needs to be back in that setting. At gymnastics he didn't get a stamp because he wouldn't listen. They were having a hard time and would have to hold him on their lap to keep him in place but when it came to doing somersaults or trying cartwheels he'd do a great job! He can do things when he wants to but when others want him to do something or NOT to do something he just can't mind. His limbs are always in overdrive. He always has to move, or act up. I am getting to a desperate spot with him again.

Too Loud

I don't know what's set Dominic off this week but it hasn't been a good one. Dave tried coaxing him for 20 minutes into his Awana cubbies class last night and then finally brought him to the gym where we were with the bigger kids doing games. BUT when he brought him in and set him down, he was ok for about 5 minutes and then I looked over to see him start wailing, holding his hands on his ears and rocking. I didn't even tell anyone I was leaving and just ran to him, scooped him up and took him out of the gym quickly. I explained to him that I had to help with big kids and he really needed to go to his class. I asked if it was too loud and he said yes. So I decided to help out with Cubbies last night since it was the only way to get him in there. There's about 40 little 3-4 year old and it wasn't too loud for the most part but any shrieks and giggles he'd bury his head into my chest holding his ears. We made it through though and they were happy he stayed. I tried to explain that he was sensitive to sound and since they are all older and never probably heard of it back in the day they looked at me kinda confused and with this pity look. I sent him on the bus this morning in good spirit so I'm hoping he has a good day.

Another Note

Sabrina,

Dominic had a really difficult time today. He did a lot of grunting, yelling, and crying. He didn't like much of anything that we or anyone else did in class today. We tied to encourage him to use words, but he was pretty upset most of the day. Lunch did go well and he gave us a smile. Just wanted to let you know.

I'm so sad! I have no idea why he had a bad day at school and maybe this explains his non- cooperation and crying in gymnastics. (I just found the note before going to bed.) I have noticed lately the rages have been coming around more but I don't have a clue what's making him so angry again. He's been really knocking Damien around and just kicking and going nuts on the floor, flopping around like a fish when something doesn't go his way. This is the 2nd day in a row they've had trouble with him this week.

Dominic and Damien

Well Monday was Dominic's first day at his new school. This is the school I worked really hard to get him in at our Grade School. It's not a Special Ed setting like before. He LOVES it. We hung out for about 1.5 hrs and watched how the day normally goes there. Dominic had so much fun showing off his little brother. It was cute. There were 5 other parents there and I did feel abit ackward at times. It's hard because you feel like you need to explain how he acts so they aren't automatically thinking, "what in the world is wrong with her kid!??" He was so excited and a bit loud, he would do what he was asked for about 30 seconds and then wanted to go somewhere else and he was making all sorts of laser sounds from Action figures. lol There are a few things though that I plan on writing a letter to his teachers about. I did explain the ADHD/ODD thing already but I haven't said anything about his sensitivity issues. When they put an art apron on him, he flipped out. He started screaming "IT'S SCRATCHING ME, IT'S SCRATCHING ME!" He was really upset. They were loosing the belts and trying to figure out what the problem was. Finally he stopped. I probably ought to make them aware of the sensitivity thing because I'm afraid after seeing a whole row of bongo drums they will pull those out and he'll run out the door crying! lol He hates certain touches, sounds, smells will make him throw up easily, textures on his tongue cause him to gag at EVERYTHING. For 2 years he had Kristi as his teacher and she knew every little unique detail of him so now I'm starting all over so we'll have to do alot of communicating with his teacher the next few months.

Then Damien had his first homevisit today and will have visits every Tuesday at 9 am. It went well and he really clicked with his teacher. I like her too! Very nice lady. She tried getting him to point out animals, they played ball, tired to get him to say anything different then his normal little "dis, uh oh, yeah, and whoa!" She's going to talk to some of the other ladies about his tongue thrust and see what we're going to do. His tongue always comes out when he says his few words. She thinks that it may be more tongue thrust than Verbal Apraxia. So... we'll have to see. Whichever it is, I can already tell he's got a long road of speech therapy ahead of him like his brother. This is much different than Dominic though because Dominic just wasn't talking! Damien says a few words but he's more like Sylvester the Cat when he says "Suffering Sucatash!" That's the best description I can give of Damien. lol

So that's about it! It's weird having one sorta leaving this journey and then entering it again with another little one. I have learned so much through all this. I think Early Childhood Development would be a great field to take up once my kids have entered school. Dominic has came a long way on his speech although he does have a lot of other things on his IEP to work on, he's made SO MUCH progress! I am so proud of him! Damien so far just thinks this is all fun and games! lol Although he cried the first few times being in Speech Playgroup during the summer, he loved it in the end. Today when she arrived this morning you could tell he was thinking, "cool! Someone else wants to play with me!"

My Own Observations

I was going to list some of the things/issues we have going on with Dominic mainly for my record. This is off the top of my head so it may not be too complete. I'll probably have to add things later on.

• Running around all the time
• doesn't like to sit and listen to direction.
• runs all over the place when not secured in a basket
• no naps
• very loud play even after asked to be quiet
• hates changes such as sitting in a new spot in the car or if something moves
• Usually cries or holds his ears when babies cry. Gets upset when he's yelled at and says to stop.
• ALWAYS playing with Thomas the train