Dominic's Parent Teacher Conference

Yesterday we had our 2nd parent teacher conference with Dominic's teacher this year. She told us that Dominic is really doing pretty well on his school work. He's recognizing letters, counting to 20 easier, overall he's improving on everything. She said his social skills have really improved from how he was at the beginning of the year.

She said behaviorally they have good weeks and bad weeks with Dominic. They'll have several good weeks and then be stuck in a bad one which is how it is here at home. She started telling me of a few situations which I will tell EI about because I know she hasn't. She mentioned how if he's zoned out of what they are doing or when frustrated he will sit with his head on his knees and rock back and forth which she "knew" was an Autistic trait but she didn't see him as Autistic. People she has NO CLUE about Disabilities. I think that's what frustrating me the most with the school is the lack of knowledge. After that remark I told her that at Early Intervention I was told when he was 3, he resembles a child with PDD's of Autism. I explained to her how it was a branch (so to speak) of Autism but a child appears more "normal" if you want to call it that. We talked about the SID testing that she had filled out and how she thought some of the questions really pertained to him. I told her I had been researching SID for awhile so I was confident that was what was going on too but I had no idea that Aspergers or PDD's (highly functioning Autism) children usually had SID.

She said that when he is upset he will still run off and hide or sit in a corner. At the beginning of the year he would only sit on the dinosaur at circle time but now he is willing to let other kids sit there. If upset, sometimes he will roll all around the room instead of walking. He will have a bad day when she is gone so they have to be careful on those days. If she tells him their schedule has changed, he will blow up at her for example no show and tell. He talks about hotwheels all day at school but does his work. He is still not able to hold a pencil right but hopefully the OT coming from EI will be able to work with him on that.

Overall it went well. I think she knows that he's got some problems that we need to get solved with him before Kindergarten. I am so scared for next year. I know we'll be having most likely some sort of transition conference to discuss Kindergarten with the principal and 3 teachers. I want someone next year who can tolerate his behavior yet help him when his Para isn't around. I want him to succeed instead of being labeled a bad kid and failing because some stupid teacher can't help figure him out.

Daddy's Had It and Mommy has too.

Friday night was so much fun. Damien who usually loves mashed potatoes and gravy puked them up all over in a bowl at the table. I pushed Dominic down under the table so he wouldn't see and be set off. Dave had to help since I was on the other side but afterwards stood up and announced, "I'm so sick of this!!!!! This is such bullshit!!!!" Oh like I'm not sick of it!?!?!?!

Saturday I put a shirt on Dominic. "ITCHY!!! It's ITCHY! I don't want to wear this!" I had to walk off. This is draining us. I put a cotton long sleeve T on him and he was fine for about a hour. Then we started tearing at his back again saying it hurt. I told him to have Daddy change it but Dominic needed to find a shirt he could wear the rest of the day. It worked I guess because we didn't have to switch again.

Dominic has been an emotional mess again. He's cried alot today about Damien bugging him playing with his toys or bugging him while playing the Xbox. He cries so much over stupid things. I just don't even know how to handle it anymore. What a fun weekend this was! lol

Dominic Playing XBox on Break From School.....

"Awwww man! Momma! I've been Served!!"

I can't even believe that 2 years ago we couldn't get 2 words pieced together out his mouth and now look at him.

Sick...Supposedly

Yesterday I got another call from the assistant teacher this time telling me I needed to come pick up because Dominic just threw up in a trash can at lunch. They would not be putting him on the bus and I have to come get him NOW and he's not to come back to school tomorrow. The way she said it pissed me off. If he's sick, it's usually a very easy thing to pick out. So I changed the other 2, got coats and shoes and we drove to the school which is about 10 minutes from our house. I went in through the gym and the nastiest smell hit me. They were having some awful looking Ravioli. Dominic was sitting in the office waiting for me since the 2nd preschool class had started and they needed to put him somewhere. He was fine so we started going back through the gym because I wanted to ask what happened. They told me he was just sitting there looking around then he got up and walked to the trash can and threw up. I almost wanted to say the smell in the gym made me want to throw up so I see why he did but I kept my mouth shut. By this time Dominic and Damien are jumping and playing around. Dominic's not acting sick. I tell her before I left, "well I hope you guys are right that it's stomach flu because he throws up at our table nearly everyday. It's not a big deal for him to get sick at home and that's why Kris is going to be evaluating him for SID." She probably doesn't even know what the hell that means.

We come home and he's fine all day. Stomach flu for any of us is only a 24 hour thing. They were trying to tell me Monday he was tired and Tuesday he was acting sick. He's completely fine here. No throwing up at home, played with trains, transformers, and watched some Thomas movies. He fought with Mia about getting off his train track, he did not act sick after bringing him home. I asked him if he felt sick and he said no. We even took him to Awana last night and he had a blast. So anyways today is Valentine's day and he's missing out of his party because they say he is not to come today. He is going to be so upset if he sees Alex with her Valentines from school and he has nothing. There's no school friday and next week they don't even HAVE school so I'm calling the office to tell the receptionist to make sure Alex gets his stuff because he's already pissed he can't go to school.

I am so mad and oh don't start Dave back up on this because he's ready to lay into the teachers. If they can prove to us some sort of stomach flu then fine but when he's acting great but the food looks and smells like shit, then I'm sure that's what set him off.

Phone Call From the Teacher

Mrs. K: "Dominic came to school saying he puked this morning. Stomach flu is going around if that's the case he needs to stay home."

Me: "well we've been having more throwing up issues but like I've said before, this I believe is part of the Sensory Intergration Disorder I believe he has.

Mrs.K: "so he did throw up today?"

Me: "yes he did but he throws up or chokes nearly everyday so of course I just sent him to school. If it's stomach flu, I'll notice the difference."

Mrs. K: "ok well I just want to make sure this isn't the stomach flu because we don't want to contaminate any other students."

Me: "while I have you on the phone, has he been eating at school? He comes home hungry daily. Could you please ask him to take some no thank you bites if he's not eating well?"

Mrs. K: "Oh well we don't force kids to eat."

Me: "I'm not saying force him but ask him to take one nibble of what he has on his plate. If it's soft that'll set him off so just like the chicken nuggets, corn dogs, and other things."

Mrs.K: "I will ask one of the other ladies to see if they can get him to eat some. Most of the time he just sits there with his food and watches everyone else."

Me: (thinking, oy oy oy!!!!!!!) "ok well that's fine then.

Mrs. K: "well if he throws up and appears sick I'll give you a call later."

Me: "ok. Thanks!"

Argh. I really do not like that these preschool teachers at the grade schoo have no experience with special needs.

Handwriting

I got a note today from Dominic's Special Ed teacher from EI saying that she's going to be sending me a "permission to evaluate" form to sign so they can start evaluating him for SID. I guess Motor skills have something to do with SID and since he can not write his name correctly they want to look at fine motor skills. Dunno. He's a lefty but he holds his pencil/markers/crayons fisted if you know what I mean. That's how he writes, colors, etc and he can do it quite well, it just looks like some old 90 yr old did it. lol

They are starting to notice this "tired" trend with him. He lays his head down quite frequently. I've been getting them to bed at 8-8:30 so I have a hard time with him being "tired." He has on occasion, sleep apnea, bad snoring and I know they "think" this could be part of the ADHD/ODD but I'm still having a hard time thinking we should just rip out his tonsils and that will fix that AND his bedwetting. It seems so simple, I just have a hard time believing it. Like an instant overnight cure.

What In The World!!!??

I finished some really indepth sensory testing and handed it in to Damien's SLP to give it to the OT for me. They asked me to comment underneath on each section. If you've taken these tests before for any kind of developmental problem you remember how they say "always, most of the time, sometimes, never. Well some of the questions didn't seem right in line with sensory issues but I guess I didn't think about it and commented as much as possible. I commented on the questions about his social skills and how he won't share at school, how he falls apart at any changes in routine, his fascination with the computer, hotwheels and Thomas. He can name all the Transfomers, all Thomas characters, etc. How he seems pretty knowledgeable on school work, etc.

Again people online say I need to research Aspergers. I looked up the symptoms and My God that has to be it. I have a feeling that this OT might say that this is his problem. If this is it, it would answer so much. His old teacher already said she was sure he had PDD's but I'm not sure if this is much different. How long can a parent be drug around before getting any answers? He's almost 5!!! I WANT FUCKING ANSWERS!!!! I'm so damn tired of it!! I just want answers!!!!

Why does he jump off the couch and bed repeatedly?
Why won't he attempt to share or play side by side with anyone?
Why does he hurt Damien and act like it's no big deal?
Why does he zone out when he's on the computer?
Why does he talk to himself about Hotwheels when we aren't even in the same room?
Why if anything changes here or at home he falls apart crying?
Why can't we do anything or go anywhere without something being too loud or too bright.
Why can't he understand no??? Why does he do things again after we say no?
Why does he repeat everything so much? He drives me nuts! I know his birthday is coming!!!
Why does my son puke at the smell of baby poop or certain textures in his mouth?
Why can't he wear all his clothes?
Why is he so fascinated with Blue chairs, the D Dinosaur spot on the circle rug, the blue cups.
When will I feel like I can take him to a friend's birthday party?
Why does my family treat him like he's a plague? My family has Alex over but never Dominic.
Why do people always say "he's just a boy!" Why don't they see what we see?
What is going to happen to him once he's in school?
Is he going to succeed?
Why does his school have teachers who are unaware or to help with special needs?????

Another Note

Dominic was really tired today. He complained most of the morning saying "I can't do it" because he was tired.

Another Note

Really worked hard on sharing issues this week. When new toys arrive in class he has trouble wanting to share. Explained how others are hurt when we don't share with them. He cried for 20 minutes of the morning on not wanting to share.

I hope they give these weekly notes to his EI Para (dealing with Special Instruction) too. I have a bad feeling they don't.

What!!

Damien was in the bathroom doing something and calling from the front room for him he answered, "what?!!!" It was plain as day and Dave and I both said at the same time, "did he just say what??!?" I think Linda his SLP is right that it's going to come sparadic rather than pushed. They worked on "P" this week and he's just not able to make that sound. Every day that goes by I wonder how much further behind his brother he is. Dominic atleast said SOME words before entering EI, Damien says just a few select ones that Mia is starting to now say.

About a year or so ago when I started updating this blog more, I wanted to add more videos basically so people (or teachers) could see things that I feel I need help with. Today when Linda was here for Damien's ST, I told her I made a video of one of the SID occurances that happened lately. I told her I figured the videos would help since they probably won't see much of it. After I showed the video she was shaking her head in disbelief. She'd never seen the pain side of the sensory issues, just the anger that he shows alot of the time when she's here. Anyways she really wants Dee, the OT (occupational therapist) at the center to start working with him ASAP. Like we've discussed though, as long as I change things to accomodate him, he's ok its when things aren't changed that there's a problem.

Man Up!

The past week Dominic's emotions have just been out of control. He cries at everything. He's seriously out to kill Santa for not bringing him a Mr. Big Modfighter by Hotwheels. Seriously. He was telling me that it fell out of Santa's sleigh and you could just see the anger and tears starting to appear in his glazed eyes.

Last night we went to Target. Target for me is a nightmare but I knew they'd have 75% off Christmas by now. So we went and it was an absolute nightmare. Dominic wanted an roboraptor and was not leaving without one. When I shopped the day after Christmas i found this mini wind up Robopet thing that I believed was in his tastes so I bought it. Big mistake. The robo pet is now his favorite toy and he cries if he's lost it. It's name is "cocoa" but it's green. The box showed the other robo toys and now he wants them all, especially the raptor. So long story short, I bought my things and Dave took him to the car. We came home and he was still sobbing uncontrollably about not getting it. We told him we'd take a few of his duplicate toys back and he could get a roboraptor but he needed to calm down. He was having a hard time breathing he was so upset. It was awful. I can't say this was the first time he acted like this because it's not. That's why I do the whole thing where I let him put a toy in the basket and then ask the clerk to put it back at the register because I'm not buying it since if I say no he'll fall to the floor in a fit. It's just easier to break his heart in the car after he's buckled up. Wrong I know but after it getting harder to deal with in the stores now I've had to resort to that.

Last night Dave was trying to calm Dominic, treating him like a baby. I really don't think this is how his crying fits need to be handled. He can't always expect toys when we go to Target and Walmart. I asked him if he'd like a big bawl baby son when he's in grade school because that's how he's going to be the way he's treating him. I don't know if Dominic's emotions are out of whack from being spoiled or if anything else is to blame. I'm getting to the point where I hate to say "oh it might be this." I'd like to say he's just trying to get his way.

Hooray!

I got Dominic to wear a sweater all day yesterday without trying to tear his skin off and without a t-shirt on underneath! It's a miracle!

Be Fair and Share

Dominic has always had a very hard time sharing and actually part of his IEP is working on his social skills. Since Christmas and this new assortment of new toys flowing into the house, he's been getting worse. Every boy type toy in this house he believes is his. No matter if he saw Damien open it for his birthday or Christmas. I'm completely frustrated with him about how he melts down throwing himself on the floor bawling. His Para says he's doing OK with sharing there but you can tell he bites his lip alot of the time and just wants to deck a kid for asking for his toy and having to share.

Tonight was just horrible. It started with a Hotwheel that Damien was playing with that Dominic got for Christmas. He ran up to Damien and snatched it. Then Damien got upset and we told him he couldn't do that (like we always do) and told him to give it back in which he threw it and then threw himself on the floor rolling around screaming and crying. Then Damien kept trying to give it back to him (yeah Damien hates seeing his siblings crying and always trys fixing the situation) and then Dominic just kept screaming and kicking so we sent him to his room.

I just wish this would quit. He going to be 5 in just 2 months. You'd think he would outgrow this stage but he's not. This is like an everyday thing for me and I'm so sick of it.

New Word

"ho ho ho!" (eyes bulging) I couldn't believe it but he was saying this today when I gave him a Santa Mr. Potato Head I bought at Target half off.

January

In January, both boys will be taking some sort of standard Sensory Test. Yesterday when Damien's SLP was here, I had said something about Damien starting to exhibit some of the signs Dominic did when we realized he had SID. She asked what he was doing so I explained about smells making him puke, seeing someone gag making him puke, textures making him puke, disliking certain textures on his hands or touching him, etc. So she definitely wants to get him checked out and she wants Dominic to start in their OT program. I told her I was going to be getting him involved into another center and she really would like me to stick to their free program instead of using our insurance for appointments. So we'll see!

New Word!

"ewwww yuck" That's considered two right?? lol

Ba-Ba

Damien's SLP came over Tuesday right as I came home with Alex and started picking her for head lice so I didn't get to sit in on his therapy. She felt so bad for me at the moment she said she would keep both boys busy with activities so I could get a start on Alex's hair.

Damien is as she thinks "trying" to make words. We're really not getting much new out of him but out of the blue he may just start saying a new sound. He is so good at making sounds of animals. It's just weird that he won't try saying any words. I don't know if he needs to see pictures to SAY a word? You show him a picture of an animal and he'll try sounding like it. If he sees some kind of an action going on like a plate falls on the floor. He'll say "uh oh!!"

His new sound last night was "baa baa" He just kept saying it over and over which was neat because he never has! Dave kept making him say it to me or scream it I should say so I would pick up that it was new. So when she comes next week I'll have another 2 syllable sound to tell her he's making.

There's Just Some Things You Can Tell

I know there are people in my life who think I'm "overacting" or "overrating" the boys problems. I know many other mom's in their own situations feel the same way. Dave's parents are some of the worst when it comes to what we deal with. First they have no idea when they visit once or twice a year. They are one of the firm believers that "Dominic is just a boy" this is "normal" "he's going to grow out of it." I hear this from soooooo many other people. It would be nice if it were true. It does upset me though that so many people believe it's just a "phase." It makes me doubt myself and doubt the Dr's and Teachers who have dealt with him.

There are instances though when we can tell the difference in real and fake with Dominic. This weekend his finger hurt. He made quite the show of it, it was hilarious. He held his pinky up like Dr. Evil all day and would loudly say "oww!" out of the blue. There was the coughing and needing "medicine." These are so typical for little kids to dramatize.

Not typical though: Having things thrown at you when you say no. Having a kid screaming when dressed, having a kid up at 10 pm jumping in bed acting like they took acid, kids only having one color they want of everything, having a kid that won't watch TV unless it's one thing they enjoy, Stacking that one thing in special order, having a kid cry from other kids in the classroom playing because they are too loud, having your kid throw up at the dinner table atleast once or twice a week, having something minimal set your kiddo into a raging fit and ruining their whole day.

How do we get people to understand Special Needs? I almost feel like I need people to come live with me for a week.

"It's Itchy!!!!!"

I bought a sweater for Dominic a month ago that I absolutely love. Dominic hates it. It's really cold right now so I put it on him and he started itching and freaking out saying "it's itchy!" over and over so I pulled it off. I put a long T on and then the Sweater. He was a bit weary but ok in it then. He was still itching his neck though. I hope he lasts 4 hours at school.